Texting: A Chatroom from Hell
by My Mind is a Nomad
Summary: This story gives a perfect explanation as to why Ciel Phantomhive doesn't own an email.
1. Chapter 1- The Madness Begins

**Texting: A Chatroom from Hell**

Ciel Phantomhive was completely finished with his office work. Today was one of the rare days where he was actually free of work, and because of this, he was extremely bored. Ciel decided to log on to his email account and find random people to chat with. He logged on and started typing.

~Catlover666 and EarlPhantomhive have logged on~

Catlover666: Why Bocchan, I didn't know you chatted on here!

EarlPhantomhive: Seriously, Sebastian? Ugh, just get me some tea.

Catlover666: Yes, my lord.

~xoxoxo has logged on~

Ciel wondered who "Xoxoxo," was, but he had a few ideas and they weren't good. He turned back to the screen and read the next reply.

Xoxoxo: HI CIEL! XD

EarlPhantomhive: Oh god no. *hides in closet*

Xoxoxo: Ciel, you're so silly!

Catlover666: Oh, hello Elizabeth.

Xoxoxo: Sebastian, call me Lizzy. I told you a thousand times!

Catlover666: I am very sorry, mistress.

Xoxoxo: It's okay! Do you like this smiley face? :) IT'S SO CUTE!

EarlPhantomhive: Lizzy, please leave…

Xoxoxo: NEVER!

~dollface has logged on~

Dollface: So I thought to myself, why not try chatting online?

~xoxoxo and dollface have logged off. Sebbyluver has logged on~

Ciel was elated that Lizzy left the chatroom, but he already had a feeling who this new member was.

Sebbyluver: Oh Sebas-chan! *licks lips*

EarlPhantomhive: Ugh, it's that red headed freak…

Catlover666: Don't you have something to reap, Grell?

Sebbyluver: I wish I was one of those cats! ;)

Catlover666: …

~Bootyshorts and Spider-Man have logged on~

Bootyshorts: Hey Ciel. ;D

Ciel face palmed and banged his desk with his fist. Then, he took an aspirin and started typing rapidly.

EarlPhantomhive: Kill. Me. Now.

Sebbyluver: I volunteer as tribute!

EarlPhantomhive: SHUT UP, YOU IMBECILE!

Bootyshorts: Wanna come play with me, Ciely-poo?

~EarlPhantomhive and Bootyshorts have logged off~

He quickly logged out, but that only made it look like he actually wanted to be with Alois. Now Ciel really had a headache.

"Sebastian! Bring me some tea!" He shouted from his desk. Then Ciel logged on Sebastian's account and looked back at the screen.

Sebbyluver: Now it's just you and me, Sebas-chan!

Spider-Man: Wrong.

Ciel quickly turned his laptop away from Sebastian, who was serving him tea. After his demon butler left, Ciel glanced back at the screen.

Sebbyluver: WHO IS THIS!? *crosses arms*

Catlover666: It's Claude.

~Catlover666 and Sebbyluver have logged off~

Spider-Man: If only, if only… *day dreaming about Ciel*

Ciel spat his tea all over the computer screen and choked, "Damn Spider!"

**(A/N: Alright, I'm done with the first chapter. Certain individuals have informed me that my story was against rule 6, so I have edited it. Let me know if it's okay, or if it still has problems.)**


	2. Chapter 2- The Madness Continues

Chapter 2- The Madness Ensues

Spider-Man: Crap, now I'm stuck with the fangirls!

~Bootyshorts had logged on~

Bootyshorts: Claude…  
Spider-Man: Master, I thought you were on a "play date" with Ciel.  
Bootyshorts: No, he ran off and hid in a closet. He's so shy. So I decided to text.  
Spider-Man: So I see…  
Bootyshorts: Do you wish to join me on a "play date?" *licks lips*

~Spider-Man and Bootyshorts have logged off. Catlover666 has logged on~

Catlover666: It appears I am alone in the Chatroom.

~Sebbyluver has logged on~

Sebbyluver: Correction- we are alone together… *blows a kiss*  
Catlover666: If you keep acting so revolting, you will be alone BY YOURSELF.  
Sebbyluver: Oh how you wound me!  
Catlover666: …

~EarlPhantomhive has logged off~

Sebbyluver: Ugh! Why can't I ever have Sebas-chan to myself!?  
EarlPhantomhive: How come whenever I log on, the freak is here?  
Catlover666: That is an excellent question…  
Sebbyluver: This is outrageous! Everyone is ignoring me! I'm out of here!

~Sebbyluver has logged off~

EarlPhantomhive: Now what?

~Xoxoxo has logged on~

Xoxoxo: Hiya, Ciel! XD

~EarlPhantomhive and Catlover666 have logged off. Dollface has logged on~

Dollface: Hello, Elizabeth. Long time, no see.  
Xoxoxo: GO AWAY, YOU PERV! Where are you Ciel!?

~Xoxoxo has logged off~

Dollface: So I thought to myself, will I ever get a girlfriend? Or at least some fangirls?


End file.
